A Mother’s Grief
I’m waiting for this sky to fall, I’m waiting for a sign
I can do hard things. I can do hard things. I can do hard things. I can do hard things. I can’t do this. I’ve said it before and I will say it again. I hate Wednesdays. Last week was an incredibly difficult week. Miss Alyssa always reminds dancers to remind themselves “I can do…
Not My Baby to Hold
Hey Charlie,I wrote something a little more than a week ago. I closed my laptop and didn’t save it. It was gone. I was exhausted I couldn’t write it again. I’m tired. Tuesday I started feeling very anxious and uneasy. Like I felt like you were lost. Like I didn’t know where you were. Denial…
This Grief has a Gravity it Pulls Me down
I actually have had the thoughts for this post for a bit but we filled up this week with things we had to do and often I was too tired after to sit down and type. Daddy’s family has seen a lot of loss. His dad, his sister, his mom, his grandmother. He was trying…
Sometimes, Quiet is Violent
See, Mommy is still finding Twenty One Pilots lyrics. It was so accurate on Wednesday. Daddy went back to the office for the first time since we took you to the hospital. Wednesdays were always Mommy and Charlie days since Riley was at school and Daddy was at work. For a stretch we would go…
I’ll put you on the map, I’ll cure you of disease.
Everything happens for a reason they say. Your death doesn’t make sense but maybe there are some things surrounding your death that did happen for a reason. The above picture is the last picture I took of you before you went to the hospital. It was one whole week before I had to take you…
What now?
Time doesn’t make sense. The days are long and draining and yet I’m doing nothing. It used to be filled with you. It took you forever to eat your meals (although I guess it’s because it was hard for you to do the work when your brain couldn’t get the messages through). The house is quiet.…
Nothing Makes Sense
If you’ve been following our journey on Facebook or GoFund Me that’s probably what directed you here. People have asked me to keep writing but it didn’t seem appropriate to keep using the updates page on GoFund Me and Facebook just didn’t seem like the right platform forever so I have looped back to an…